“There are two kinds of souls. Those that make an imprint on life, on
themselves and on existence and those that carry that imprint and cause
it to grow. There are those that grow through their undertaking of
making an impression on themselves and their world and there are those
that grow through inspiration which is received from outside themselves.
Man is superior in his yearning to create and impress and therefore
recites the blessing “Blessed is He … that He did not make me a woman.
"Man however has the distinct disadvantage of being limited to the narrow
limitations of his spiritual and physical makeup, which can lead him
astray from G-ds ultimate plan. Woman is superior by virtue of her
receptivity. This superiority allows her to be impressed and inspired by
the all encompassing bounty which G-d created in this world. She
therefore recites the blessing “Blessed is He … who has made me
according to His will. She can aspire to fulfill G-ds will without
turning astray." (Rav A.Y. Kook, Olas Rayah, pps 71-72)
Translation from R' Yaakov Haber's www.TorahLab.org
Monday, December 22, 2014
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
Problems with the apologetics
Problems with the apologetics
1. Diminishes the authority of the rabbinate. Rabbis are men. If men are so deficient, who will want to listen to them?
2. Diminishes respect for fathers, husbands, brothers, and sons.
3. Hurts shiduchim. A woman might say if men are so low, I need the best man so I can have my equal. Men say, women are supposed to be so holy. This one is not.
4. Diminishes appreciation for wives. A man might say, women are supposed to be so holy. What's wrong with my wife?
5. Disincentive for men when mitzvos are made to look like signposts of deficiency. The apologetics are emasculating too.
6. Disincentive for women who may begin to overrate themselves. I know of one man who tells his wife that she is complete and her only job in life is to help him.
7. Confuses the idea of yetzer tov and yetzer hara going together.
8. Possible idol worship in positing a yetzer tov without a yetzer hara. Creates a false god.
9. Unnerves women because then who can they rely on? Women don't want to be superior. They just want respect. Men have the desire to conquer and be superior. Telling women they are superior actually makes them uncomfortable. It's what men think women want to hear.
1. Diminishes the authority of the rabbinate. Rabbis are men. If men are so deficient, who will want to listen to them?
2. Diminishes respect for fathers, husbands, brothers, and sons.
3. Hurts shiduchim. A woman might say if men are so low, I need the best man so I can have my equal. Men say, women are supposed to be so holy. This one is not.
4. Diminishes appreciation for wives. A man might say, women are supposed to be so holy. What's wrong with my wife?
5. Disincentive for men when mitzvos are made to look like signposts of deficiency. The apologetics are emasculating too.
6. Disincentive for women who may begin to overrate themselves. I know of one man who tells his wife that she is complete and her only job in life is to help him.
7. Confuses the idea of yetzer tov and yetzer hara going together.
8. Possible idol worship in positing a yetzer tov without a yetzer hara. Creates a false god.
9. Unnerves women because then who can they rely on? Women don't want to be superior. They just want respect. Men have the desire to conquer and be superior. Telling women they are superior actually makes them uncomfortable. It's what men think women want to hear.
Thursday, November 13, 2014
Rabbi Avigdor Miller on the exemption
As we know, men are commanded to
perform mitzvos asei she'haz'man grama, time-bound mitzvos. Women, on the other
hand, are not required to perform these mitzvos. What is the reason for this
difference? The answer is that women have other important obligations to tend
to, which exempt her from these commandments. A woman must know that she is a
briah shel chessed, she has been created for the purpose of performing chessed.
Being a wife and mother is a very significant role, and it requires her to be
selfless and totally dedicated to performing chessed! It takes a woman's entire
effort to succeed in being an efficient mother and wife. Investing her
abilities in raising children is very time consuming but is a tremendous zechus
for her! (Rabbi Avigdor Miller Speaks, pp. 271-3)
Monday, October 13, 2014
Nissan Mindel on Shelo Asani Isha
"Anyone who is familiar with the high esteem in which the Jewish woman is held in the Torah, and with the place which she occupies in Jewish life, will not be foolish enough to think that a reflection on Jewish womanhood. Suffice it to mention that in the era of prophecy, there were seven prophetesses mentioned by name in the T'NaCh. They were: Sarah, Miriam, Devorah, Hannah, Abigail, Huldah and Esther." Sarah, the Torah tells us, was in some respects even superior to Abraham, for G-d told Abraham, "All that Sarah will tell you, listen to her. Moreover, our Sages of the Mishnah and Talmud frequently emphasized the moral strength and spiritual excellence of the Jewish woman. They reminded us that it was in the merit of the righteous Jewish women that the children of Israel were liberated from Egyptian bondage"; that at the giving of the Torah, the women were approached first; that women had no part in the Golden Calf, but at the building of the Sanctuary the women were the most generous; that they had a leading part in the miracles of Purim and Chanukah, ete., etc, History also records that throughout the long martyrology of our people in exile, Jewish women faced death with the same courage as the men, and sometimes greater, in their devotion to G-d and the Torah and the Jewish way of life.
"Thus, when the Jew makes the blessing thanking G-d for not making him a woman, he does not say these words with any feeling of superiority, but quite for another reason, as will be made clear presently.
"In the nature of things, the husband's task is to be the breadwinner, while the wife has to take care of the home and the children, and to manage the whole household. This is a very complicated task, requiring a great deal of skill, patience, understanding, and many other high qualities, which Divine Providence so generously bestowed upon the women. It is doubtful whether any executive position which the husband may hold requires greater skill and is more exacting than the domestic responsibilities of the wife and mother.
"In view of the above, the Divine Torah has exempted the Jewish woman from the obligation to fulfill certain Mitzvoth. She is equally with her husband duty-bound to observe all the prohibitions of the Torah, the "don'ts" (and these are in the majority-365 don'ts to 248 do's). However, in regard to the positive commandments, the Jewish woman is excused from the fulfillment of some of them (by no means all), mainly those which have a time factor or limit, out of consideration for her important wifely and motherly duties to which the Torah gives precedence.
"In this respect, therefore, the Jewish woman is rather "privileged" than "underprivileged."
"However, the male Jew, who has not been given the special privileges enjoyed by the Jewish woman, has something to compensate for them, namely, the opportunity to commune with G-d more frequently through the fulfillment of those Mitzvoth from which the Jewish woman is exempt. This is no small compensation, and it is for this reason-for the opportunity to serve G-d with these additional Mitzvoth-that the male Jew makes the blessing, 'Who has not made me a woman.'"
Nissan Mindel, "As For Me- My Prayer", 1975, pp. 45-47.
"Thus, when the Jew makes the blessing thanking G-d for not making him a woman, he does not say these words with any feeling of superiority, but quite for another reason, as will be made clear presently.
"In the nature of things, the husband's task is to be the breadwinner, while the wife has to take care of the home and the children, and to manage the whole household. This is a very complicated task, requiring a great deal of skill, patience, understanding, and many other high qualities, which Divine Providence so generously bestowed upon the women. It is doubtful whether any executive position which the husband may hold requires greater skill and is more exacting than the domestic responsibilities of the wife and mother.
"In view of the above, the Divine Torah has exempted the Jewish woman from the obligation to fulfill certain Mitzvoth. She is equally with her husband duty-bound to observe all the prohibitions of the Torah, the "don'ts" (and these are in the majority-365 don'ts to 248 do's). However, in regard to the positive commandments, the Jewish woman is excused from the fulfillment of some of them (by no means all), mainly those which have a time factor or limit, out of consideration for her important wifely and motherly duties to which the Torah gives precedence.
"In this respect, therefore, the Jewish woman is rather "privileged" than "underprivileged."
"However, the male Jew, who has not been given the special privileges enjoyed by the Jewish woman, has something to compensate for them, namely, the opportunity to commune with G-d more frequently through the fulfillment of those Mitzvoth from which the Jewish woman is exempt. This is no small compensation, and it is for this reason-for the opportunity to serve G-d with these additional Mitzvoth-that the male Jew makes the blessing, 'Who has not made me a woman.'"
Nissan Mindel, "As For Me- My Prayer", 1975, pp. 45-47.
Monday, September 22, 2014
Rav Schwab's book on tefillah
Rav Schwab's book on tefillah is impressive, but I do wonder about the commentary on 'shelo asani ishah.' It comes across as rather apologetic. I spoke to him about this topic and he told me that to say women are more spiritual than men is "ridiculous." He said men are more spiritual in ways, and women are more in ways.
I have some tapes from his tefillah series, but not the ones on the early part of the siddur. And his book on siddur is not his writing but is based on the tapes. I do wonder if his words were misconstrued on this topic. Our generation has become so ingrained in the concept that women "are on a higher plane" that we sometimes imagine that idea in writings that preceded feminism.
For example, R' Eli Munk also did not say that women are more spiritual. (The R' Schwab tefillah book editor references R' Munk as a secondary source for the idea). R' Munk only says that women's creation was positive and affirmative, not that it was better.
The Maharal says in many places that men are more spiritual and are on a higher plane. See Tiferes Israel 4 and 28, Chidushei Agados Makkos 23b, Gur Aryeh, parshas Tazriah, Derech Chaim on "more wives more witchcraft" and "don't speak too much to the woman."
The Magen Avraham says women's yetzer tov is smaller. (Zies Ra'anan on Yalkut Shimoni, Shmuel 1:1).
I know of numerous other sources like this. As for R' Hirsch, contrary to popular misconception, he says in many places that men and women are equal.
R' Feinstein, the Lubavitcher Rebbe, R' Soloveitchik, and R' Avigdor Miller also assert equality. This women as better speech does not have classic sources behind it. It's a sad result of feminism and other gentile influences.
I asked R' Schwab if the idea could harm marriages. He said that it definitely could and he volunteered to speak to people about it.
I'd like to add one other thought. The teaching that women are more spiritual has a strange implication which is this: if women are exempt from mitzvos because they are more spiritual, then their day must be less spiritual. How else would men catch up? But this is exactly what we fear women will think, that their role is less spiritual. Thus, the apologetics backfire like any untruth.
This is why the approach of R' Moshe, the Rebbe, the Rav, and R' Miller are best for this era. Men and women are equal but different. And this is exactly how R' Schwab explained it to me too. How something other than that appeared in his book, which appeared after his passing, I cannot say.
I have some tapes from his tefillah series, but not the ones on the early part of the siddur. And his book on siddur is not his writing but is based on the tapes. I do wonder if his words were misconstrued on this topic. Our generation has become so ingrained in the concept that women "are on a higher plane" that we sometimes imagine that idea in writings that preceded feminism.
For example, R' Eli Munk also did not say that women are more spiritual. (The R' Schwab tefillah book editor references R' Munk as a secondary source for the idea). R' Munk only says that women's creation was positive and affirmative, not that it was better.
The Maharal says in many places that men are more spiritual and are on a higher plane. See Tiferes Israel 4 and 28, Chidushei Agados Makkos 23b, Gur Aryeh, parshas Tazriah, Derech Chaim on "more wives more witchcraft" and "don't speak too much to the woman."
The Magen Avraham says women's yetzer tov is smaller. (Zies Ra'anan on Yalkut Shimoni, Shmuel 1:1).
I know of numerous other sources like this. As for R' Hirsch, contrary to popular misconception, he says in many places that men and women are equal.
R' Feinstein, the Lubavitcher Rebbe, R' Soloveitchik, and R' Avigdor Miller also assert equality. This women as better speech does not have classic sources behind it. It's a sad result of feminism and other gentile influences.
I asked R' Schwab if the idea could harm marriages. He said that it definitely could and he volunteered to speak to people about it.
I'd like to add one other thought. The teaching that women are more spiritual has a strange implication which is this: if women are exempt from mitzvos because they are more spiritual, then their day must be less spiritual. How else would men catch up? But this is exactly what we fear women will think, that their role is less spiritual. Thus, the apologetics backfire like any untruth.
This is why the approach of R' Moshe, the Rebbe, the Rav, and R' Miller are best for this era. Men and women are equal but different. And this is exactly how R' Schwab explained it to me too. How something other than that appeared in his book, which appeared after his passing, I cannot say.
Saturday, September 13, 2014
R' Miller: IS THERE A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE NESHAMA (SOUL) OF A MAN VS. A WOMAN?
IS THERE A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE NESHAMA (SOUL) OF A MAN VS. A WOMAN?
from http://www.rabbimillersanswers.com/
"In neshamos there is no difference. Hashem gives people different ways different opportunities to perfect their neshama. When a woman is married and she dedicates her life to others, she’s doing something that transforms her nature. It’s impossible for her to function successfully and to remain selfish.
Her main achievement is transforming her neshama by doing chesed (kindness) to Hashem’s people for the sake of Heaven.
She has all the functions of other people upon her. She has to carry children with in her, and then she has to nurse the child. She has to worry about children at night; sometimes they’re not well. She has to think about preparing food for everybody. Everything is for others.
She does it selflessly like a busy Jewish mother usually does. It’s an extremely important achievement for her neshama, and she gains perfection in that way. We don’t expect her to devote hours to Torah learning. Her main achievement is transforming her neshama by doing chesed (kindness) to Hashem’s people for the sake of Heaven. (If it’s done properly, it’s not merely done like gentiles do, but it’s done with the intention of serving Hashem.)
A man has other opportunities. A man is not limited; he doesn’t carry a child within himself. He doesn’t have to nurse babies. Nevertheless he has to do many things. He has to go out to the marketplace, make a living. And there are many nisyonos (tests) in making a living. All the laws of choshen mishpat (business dealings) apply when you have to compete with other people for parnassa (livelihood).
Therefore a man gains his perfection other ways, and is expected also to give part of his efforts to learning Torah and doing more mitzvos than a woman is able to do because she is busy. Each one gains perfection in a different way. (#791, 10 Aspects of Shabbos)"
from http://www.rabbimillersanswers.com/
"In neshamos there is no difference. Hashem gives people different ways different opportunities to perfect their neshama. When a woman is married and she dedicates her life to others, she’s doing something that transforms her nature. It’s impossible for her to function successfully and to remain selfish.
Her main achievement is transforming her neshama by doing chesed (kindness) to Hashem’s people for the sake of Heaven.
She has all the functions of other people upon her. She has to carry children with in her, and then she has to nurse the child. She has to worry about children at night; sometimes they’re not well. She has to think about preparing food for everybody. Everything is for others.
She does it selflessly like a busy Jewish mother usually does. It’s an extremely important achievement for her neshama, and she gains perfection in that way. We don’t expect her to devote hours to Torah learning. Her main achievement is transforming her neshama by doing chesed (kindness) to Hashem’s people for the sake of Heaven. (If it’s done properly, it’s not merely done like gentiles do, but it’s done with the intention of serving Hashem.)
A man has other opportunities. A man is not limited; he doesn’t carry a child within himself. He doesn’t have to nurse babies. Nevertheless he has to do many things. He has to go out to the marketplace, make a living. And there are many nisyonos (tests) in making a living. All the laws of choshen mishpat (business dealings) apply when you have to compete with other people for parnassa (livelihood).
Therefore a man gains his perfection other ways, and is expected also to give part of his efforts to learning Torah and doing more mitzvos than a woman is able to do because she is busy. Each one gains perfection in a different way. (#791, 10 Aspects of Shabbos)"
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
Why Is There More Fixed Prayer for Men
Here's a proposal of my own. Women are more dependent in their role. Their sense of dependency therefore is more pronounced. Men are asked to go out and be conquerors. Therefore, therefore they engage in more prayer to bring out the feeling of dependency.
Of course, you could say to this that women are dependent on people so they need prayer to switch that to the awareness of God. And they do need prayer. But they don't need to be forced to start.
Now someone directed me to an idea, with a Torah source that I can't recall, that less prayer was imposed on women because we don't ask the tzibur to do something they can't handle. Thus, maybe women are quicker to engage in prayer but can't handle as much. I met a young woman recently who attends a Modern Orthodox school where the boys and girls attend minyan together (with a mechitza). Thus, for the first time in her life she was doing a full schacharis every day. She said she found it overwhelming and didn't understand how men were able to do it everyday. Another woman who did the same for a time so that she could say kaddish for her further made the same comment.
So who is more spiritual, the one who starts more automatically or the one who takes it further?
I have no idea. They are different.
Of course, you could say to this that women are dependent on people so they need prayer to switch that to the awareness of God. And they do need prayer. But they don't need to be forced to start.
Now someone directed me to an idea, with a Torah source that I can't recall, that less prayer was imposed on women because we don't ask the tzibur to do something they can't handle. Thus, maybe women are quicker to engage in prayer but can't handle as much. I met a young woman recently who attends a Modern Orthodox school where the boys and girls attend minyan together (with a mechitza). Thus, for the first time in her life she was doing a full schacharis every day. She said she found it overwhelming and didn't understand how men were able to do it everyday. Another woman who did the same for a time so that she could say kaddish for her further made the same comment.
So who is more spiritual, the one who starts more automatically or the one who takes it further?
I have no idea. They are different.
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