Personal regulation

Emotion is to women what sex is to men, an all consuming drive. It needs to be regulated. The drive in men when channeled becomes like fuel for a rocket. It gives a man energy to study Torah, daven 3x a day, do mitzvos, guide his family, build communities, etc. It also needs a direct outlet and that comes in the form of marital relations about which there are rules as to when and how. It must be wholesome, not perverse. Without the regulation, a man, and nearly any man, can become like Tiger Woods, or Elliot Spitzer, or Anthony Wiener, or countless other men who are out of control sexually. They tear their lives apart.


Likewise, women's emotions when regulated become the fuel for her good deeds. Love is an emotion. Caring for others comes largely from emotions. Excitement for Yom Tov and Shabbos can be an emotion. Love of Hashem is largely emotional. There is plenty of room for emotion in a woman's religious life. It is a key component in her religious life. But unregulated, a woman becomes a Tiger Woods, an Elliot Spitzer. If she spills her emotions wildly, unregulated, undisciplined into her daily life, she tears her life apart and that of the people who depend on her. Emotion in women is a potent force like sex in men.


The regulation goes on all day long. A man wants to look at every woman who passes by. He must not. He wants to do all kinds of things that he must not. He must use his chochmah and his will to discipline himself. He feels good about himself when he does. He becomes holy when he does.


Likewise, a woman must regulate her emotions all the time. She can't explode with torrents of emotion on a daily or hourly basis or be consumed with negativity which is a woman's version of being perverse. She must handle her emotions with maturity. She must use her binah and her will to regulate herself. She feels good about herself when she does. She becomes holy when she does.