Everything in this world works in a balance with something else. That's the key point. If you want to say that men go higher and lower (see R' Kook on shelo asani isha), that's fine. But what you cannot say is that women have a bigger yetzer tov and a smaller yetzer hara. If one is big then the other is big. Otherwise you are describing God and that is why I worry that this woman worship trend is a kind of avodah zara. Yet, this is something people in kiruv say all the time - one way or another. And it's just flattery. Remember the Satan lusts after Chava and uses flattery to get her. Sometimes I listen to kiruv rabbis wax on with this women's spirituality routine and I think of alpha male baboons that beat down all the males and take the women for themselves. It seems adulterous at times. And it's lashon hara against men and sinas chinom too. And it's the worst kind of sinas chinam. If the Chasidim mock the Litvacks, that's wrong but the Chasdim can still live successfully in their own community. But if you mock men, then every community goes bad because men and women live in the same communities and the same homes. And women don't work well with men that they look down on.
The idea that something about the 'status' of women as a group will change in the period before the geula is not new. The Baal HaTanya talks about that. I saw the source 25 years ago. Same with the idea that women's bodies have a special kind of ruchniyus to it. R' Hirsch mentions the creation from body not earth. If what Ms. Heshilis is saying is true it shouldn't be new to Torah thought, even if it was new to some people. If it is new to the readers of her book, maybe they should digest it a bit and see how it meshes with the words of the Maharal and others who posit that men are more spiritual before they present these ideas to the public. This topic is quite complicated so if you read something that makes it all seem simple and clear then you likely are working with oversimplifications.
As for changes to the world at the end of days, we have to recognize that what also happens close to the geulah is an emergence of evil in the world, of a takeover by chutzpah, and violation of nature. Would you say that the public acceptance of homosexuality is a positive sign of the end of days too? What about sexual immorality? What about the chutzpah of the young? The social order has been turned upside down and generally that's a bad thing. Our society is in a meltdown and feminism is a primary cause of that. So we need to be careful with this topic.
One sign of a decaying society is the degradation of men. Picture the American ghetto for example. If you tear down the men, then you tear down your society. Klal Yisrael at the end of golus is in a terribly degraded state. Is one playing into that with a portrayal of these topics which lists everything good about women and everything bad about men?
I think he is, if his portrayal is not balanced. If you feel that you cannot even hint that women are less spiritual, then you cannot say the other stuff either, particularly that which associates women and the shekina. Talk about idol worship. (Remember the shekina is not God, it's an outer aspect, the inner being male). And this is likely why contemporary gadolim portray men and women as equal, because people cannot handle the complex picture of differing statuses and advantages. We should follow their lead and not deem ourselves as knowing better.
It doesn't matter that the apologetics are common amongst kiruv 'professionals.' As for kiruv, well let me tell you that I know the field well, and can tell you that it isn't a science. Few people are 'trained' in kiruv. They just go into it, largely for parnassah. And they make mistakes all the time, terrible mistakes. Beyond that, I know many kiruv people who know not to teach feminist apologetics.
I also know many men who are very turned off by the apologetics. They are just furious about it. It's emasculating. You have to wonder if it feeds into men going off the derech. Some say that less men become BTs and more men go off the derech. If that's true, do the apologetics play into it? What would happen to a baseball manager that told his players how bad they were all the time? Would that be motivating? Rather managers generally build their players up. I know story after story, particularly of the very successful ones. That's why people do it for the women. Are the men any different in their need for self-esteem?
All kiruv groups have a very low success rate of seeing people become frum for all the people they meet so we can't assume that because this kind of teaching is so common that it doesn't hurt kiruv. So we must consider the effect of kiruv presentations on everyone, particularly the sensitive men. The arrogant ones may need to be taken down a notch. The sensitive ones need some encouragement to take on the heavy, heavy burden of Judaism. People in kiruv love being frum and assume every other man will too, no matter how you portray it. Just give him a Gemara and he'll be happy. That's a bad assumption. For many, it's a difficult life and an overwhelming one to take on. Aside from the massive financial burden, just consider the rules concerning sex. Wow! Talk about being unfair to one gender. Furthermore, BTs are at the bottom of frum society. It can be very depressing to go from feeling like a hotshot at Yale to being the underclass in the frum world where even your kids can't marry into the mainstream. You want to add to that bad feeling by making men seem like the bottom gender too? It turns many off. It breaks up many a marriage. It's very short-sighted. It also shows a misunderstanding of women, who don't want to see themselves as better. That's a male trait actually - competitiveness. Much of this woman as better stuff is what men in kiruv think women want to hear.
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